Rant - Censor Deez!

Why is it that almost every new comedy and horror film released on DVD these days is UNCENSORED? When did this heinous act start? Personally, I find it kind of annoying; especially since most of the time very little substantial change is made from the theatrical release. Usually, all that is added in is expletives, T&A (not that this is a bad thing), or more torture scenes (when did torture become horror?). It's my opinion that movies will sell on DVD just fine based on their own merit. If its a good movie, it should sell well on DVD; if not it probably shouldn't have been made in the first place. Why ruin good movie, or make a crappy movie worse, by putting scenes back in that were originally taken out? In most cases those scenes were taken out for good reason - because they sucked and added nothing to the narrative!

However, based on DVD sales of UNCENSORED movies, I may be in the minority on this opinion. Some marketing study out there must have convinced the studios that it is more lucrative to write "UNCENSORED", "UN-RATED", or the all mighty "UNCENSORED & UNRATED" in big bold letters on the DVD case, otherwise I fail to see why its done. Am I missing something, or is this practice just used to trick consumers into thinking they are getting more for their money? Oh, and has anybody actually bought an UNCENSORED labeled DVD that was better than the theatrical release? I haven't.

Movie Review: Dave Chappelle's Block Party

Dave Chappelle’s Block Party (3 of 5): I really like Dave Chappelle’s comedy, especially Chappelle’s Show, so I was excited to get a chance to watch this film. After watching it, I am happy to report that it is pretty good, as long as you go into the movie knowing what to expect. Don’t put this movie in expecting two hours of stand up comedy or a re-hash of Chappelle’s Show. If you do, you’ll be disappointed. Block Party does have plenty of comedy in it, but its main focus is music. In late 2004 (right after he landed a $50 million contract with Comedy Central and just before he broke under the pressure and moved to South Africa) Dave decided to throw a concert in Brooklyn. Dave Chappelle’s Block Party is the documentary of his experience organizing the concert and trying to get a variety of people from his hometown to show up. If you are a fan of rap/hip hop/soul/r&b music sung by people with actual talent, you will like this movie. You get music from a lot of really talented artists including: Mos Def, Kanye West, The Roots, Dead Prez, Erykah Badu and even a reunion of The Fugees. Block Party primarily showcases the music, but there is a lot of funny moments and entertainment from Chappelle throughout the film. Beyond that, I think you’ll really enjoy seeing how genuinely Dave seems to love the music and the sincerity in which he brings people of all different backgrounds together to his concert. Dave Chappelle’s Block Party isn't for every one, but if you are a fan of either the comic or the music, you’ll find something to enjoy.

Movie Review - The World's Fastest Indian

The World’s Fastest Indian (5 of 5): The World’s Fastest Indian is a rare gem of a movie that did not receive the recognition or attention it deserved when in was released in 2005. This movie is about Burt Munro (played by Anthony Hopkins), a real life New Zealander who spent around 25 years of his life customizing a 1920s Indian motorcycle. Munro’s dream is to take the bike halfway around the world to the Bonneville Salt Flats Test Track in Utah, the only place where he can find out how fast it will actually go. Munro meets a variety of interesting and supportive people in his voyage, and his personality seems to bring out the best in all of them. After watching some of the DVD extras, including a 1960s documentary on the real life Burt Munro, I can tell you that Anthony Hopkins is dead on in his portrayal of the somewhat eccentric man. I highly recommend this movie. It is an inspirational tale of overcoming adversity and highlights a decency and kindness of strangers that is rarely depicted in today’s films. Check it out – this is one of those rare movies that will actually leave you feeling “happy” at its conclusion.

Rant - Commercials

My typical night at the movies goes is a little something like this:

First, of course, I purchase my tickets – the MovieGuys do not endorse theatre hopping! Next, I might buy some popcorn and a drink for the little lady and me. After that, I’ll get in the theatre, find a seat (see MovieGuy #2’s previous rant about seating), and wait for the lights to dim. Unfortunately, it’s at that point, when the lights turn off, that I always start to get pissed. It never fails, every time… Right when the lights start dim… Right when I should be getting excited about the show starting, my urge to kill starts to rise.

The reason this happens to me is because, instead of a movie, I am treated with ten minutes of f@&king crappy ass, months old, television commercials! What the hell?

I HATE commercials in front of movies! Seriously, sitting through them drives me crazy. I am not a violent guy, but I literally have to squeeze the armrest next to me in order to keep myself from screaming at the screen in maniacal rage while punching my fist through the head of the guy in front of me. It’s bad enough that I am out $40.00 by the time I sit down in the theatre. Now, I have to pay money to watch crappy commercials too!? That doesn’t seem fair to me.

Seriously, do we need commercials in front of a movie? No, I don’t think we do. Don’t we get enough advertisements on TV, in magazines, and on the Internet (yes, I know Viagra is great, now leave me alone!)? Sure we do, and they are usually more up to date! Do you know how many times I have seen the same advertisement for Axe Body Spray, Levi’s Jeans and the Toyota Scion? WAY TOO MANY TIMES! So many times, in fact, that at one point I was actually contemplating buying a coffin, err, I mean Scion, squeezing my fat legs into a pair of tight fitted 501s and coating myself in a thin layer of Axe for a cruising night on the town! Thankfully, common sense prevailed.

Sure, commercials give movie theatre chains a little extra revenue to supplement today’s increasingly expensive film prints and decreasing audiences, but isn’t there another way? Anything besides showing commercials before the movies would be better. I know! How about theatre chains start selling Axe Body Spray, Levi’s Jeans, Lottery tickets and other advertised items right next to the JuJu Bees and Snow Caps in the concession counter! At least then, customers would have a choice.

Certainly, I am not the only person that hates commercials in front of their movies. Make yourselves heard! Let’s rise and put an end to this blasphemous movie practice. Let’s take back our movie going experience by eliminating the movie theatre commercials.

Movie Review - The Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada

The Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada (4 of 5): Three Burials opens with a rather confusing first half hour of flashbacks and character introductions, but after that, this movie gets pretty darn good! Directed by Tommy Lee Jones, this film is about a cowboy (Pete Jones) who is friends with an illegal Mexican immigrant cowboy (Estrada) that is killed by a reckless US Border Patrol agent (Mike Norton). The murder and ensuing cover up of his friend's death doesn’t sit well with Pete, so he kidnaps Norton and forces him to exhume Estrada’s corpse. The rest of the movie follows Pete in his efforts to get Estrada back to Mexico for a proper burial and force Norton to understand and take responsibility for his actions. This is a really good movie and I was very impressed with Tommy Lee Jones’ performance. He does a great job playing a weathered cowboy and you’ll ask yourself if his character isn’t just a little bit crazy in the head. There is also some beautiful cinematography in this movie that will make you want to move out west. Overall, this movie is a great story about friendship and reconciliation.

Movie Review - Spirited Away

Spirited Away (4 of 5): Spirited Away is a charming little film about a young girl who gets trapped in a spirit realm while trying to save her parents who have been transformed into pigs. This movie was directed by Hayao Miyazaki, an acclaimed Japanese animation director known for many films including Princess Mononoke (which I reviewed last month). The animation in this movie holds to Miyazaki’s style – it is gorgeous, detailed and colorful. At its heart, Spirited Away is a children’s movie, but it succeeds very well in entertaining adults too. This movie is extremely creative and filled with tons of memorable characters, including a witch, a dragon and a giant baby. Don’t let the Japanese style of animation keep you from seeing this film and enjoying what it has to offer.

Netflix Rocks

UPDATE! (4-16-07): As a movie enthusiast and Netflix fan, I am always looking for new Netflix friends. If you would like to have me as a friend on your Netflix account, just send me an email to p_fish77@hotmail.com using the "invite friends" feature in your Netflix account. I look forward to hearing from you!

MovieGuy #1
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“Why don’t you have a Netflix account?” This is the question I keep asking all of my friends. I joined Netflix almost one year ago and have never looked back. Simply put, Netflix is awesome! Allow me extol its virtues:

1) No late fees! - Yeah, you can keep the movie as long as you like. But, you probably already new that if you spend any amount of time surfing the web or watching TV – Netflix advertises like crazy.
2) The queue! - Keep all the movies you could ever want to see on one list. No wandering around Blockbuster anymore trying to remember what you wanted to see. Plus, you can go around annoying all your friends by telling them “oh yeah, that movie is on my list”, or “no, I haven’t seen it yet, but it is on my list”. They’ll get so annoyed hearing about your list – it’s great!
3) No postal fees and movies arrive super fast! - All the movies come in a beautiful red envelope and you don’t pay a dime for shipping. Most of the time, I get a new movie about two days after I drop the old one in my mailbox.
4) Multiple plans to choose from! - I use the 3 at a time unlimited plan. This plan allows me to have 3 movies out at one time and I have unlimited rentals a month. There are a variety of plans from which to choose, ranging from $5.99/mo for cheap people, to $47.99/mo for people who still live in their parent's basement.
5) Huge selection of DVDs! - You’ll have access to over 60,000 titles. Sorry, no porn.

Hopefully (overlooking the unavailability of porno) you can now understand some of the greatness of Netflix. If you already have a Netflix account, let me know your username because I really want to be able to use Netflix’s “friend” feature. If you don’t have an account, go sign up for a free trial!